The Cooking Culture

Sadly, I only get to take a picture of my aunty alone because my handpone was running out of battery when I supposed to take a picture of my aunties chopping up things together in the kitchen. Sigh. 

Cooking is one of the activities that carried out routinely either by woman or men. The concept of cooking which is known only done by women has now changed. From the restaurant to the roadside stall, I often encounter the major role in the kitchen is held by men. Unfortunately, I am not going to discuss about feminism or stereotype that grows in the society that all women should be agile in the kitchen matters. Up to now, I still ofter hear demands for women to be at least good at cooking.

More than just peeling the onion, chop vegetables, until clean out the fish entrails, cooking is rather a simple activity that can cultivate a lot of stories left in the cooking place. In remote areas in Indonesia, we can easily find cooking activity that held together, especially on celebrations such as marriage, birth, until the coronation of chiefs. In other countries such as China, cook together activity is also held every year to celebrate the harvest.

For any beliefs behind such activities in any country; like hope for luck and be protected from diseases as well as the distress, one thing I have learned that the only essence of all those things is togetherness. The gathering of fellow mankind. 

What then makes this activity become interesting, is its ability to unify a group of people all together in one particular place. Usually, they will be conversing with each other while working on their own role. There will be ones busy peeling vegetables, another ones are busy chopping up, and the rest will get to wash the dishes. In this forum, we will easily recognize whose voice is the loudest, whose laughter is the funniest, and whose talk is the least.

Several weeks ago, I was involved in a cook together activity. So my family had just held my eldest sister's wedding. The brothers and sisters of mom and dad came from outside the town. It has been a long time I didn't get to meet the big family of mine because my mom's relatives are entirely living outside the Sulawesi island such as Jakarta, Bandung, Banten, Malang, Palembang, and Papua. Meanwhile, my dad's youngest sister lives in Jakarta and mostly lives in Bone city—which is only 5 hours away by car from city of Makassar.

The long distance relationship which my parents happen to have with their relatives become a golden chance everytime one family member held a wedding event. And the cooking activity, is one of the activities which is most pleasant afterall. Since that is where a little reunion is formed, then there goes the light yet memorable chitchat. 

Well yeah, I often find that the luxury precisely comes from things that are traditional.

Ramadhan

I love seeing people gather around a roadside stall when the sun is about to go down in Ramadhan month. It has always been my favourite time. Like, it is the moment that I am gonna miss the most when the month has passed. I love seeing people stop by, choosing what they'd like to have for their fast-breaking, heading somewhere again, and that moment happens ever afternoon even after the sky went dark. I always imagine the ones whom they bought those foods for. I imagine how happy it makes them—to have something to eat afterall. Maybe it is for their family, their friends, or the ones they never even talked to. Whoever they are, I always imagine their happy faces because it is something that made for good—pretty much something that connects relationship altogether.

The feeling of not seeing my friends for quiet a while always got me nervous. I can't wait to get to see them, and Ramadhan has always been the right time to make up some plan. Of course, we don't wait until Ramadhan to make time right. But it is just a perfect moment that no other months can bring the atmosphere ever again.

It feels good to be around friends after a long break of minding each ones' business. There will be a lot to talk about, and much time to spend by laughing over silly random things. I remember the moments back in college years. I used to spend time with my friends until past midnight in a minimarket cafetaria. We just talk, laugh until we all are so crack up, with silence that occasionally comes in between. It is funny how far we've become right now from that decade. We are so busy pretending to be busy. Hahahaha.

There are so much good things that Ramadhan brings that I wish it comes twice annually.

They are my pain killers. But as you know, the medicine doesn't always work well. However, you gotta have something to heal your suffer. You never know whether the medicines worth the try. And we, human, always have things labeled. So that I gotta label them as my pain killers. Because well, they just are. I'd love to see them after a long while not consuming pain healer, which is the last time we met few times back. Lol. 

Say Hi To April

Hi! So I skipped a month not making any blogpost. I guess there's somebody out there patiently waiting for my new writing like maybe she/he checks my blog for each two days or so, and just by now they feel happy seeing a new headline here. Hahaha.

Regardless of my birthday, this month has been full of pleasure. It's because of nobody but myself. I can't believe I spent two times in this month being alone in a foodcourt—ordering and have my own seat. I have always wanted to do that since then, and I finally did it. I know that being alone is not something to mourn over. Instead, I can let my mind go to some places while I chew, and thinking of where my friends are at the moment (because we no longer meet as often as we used to since I graduated in September 2015). If the idea of being mature is pictured by a person who get to eat alone in a crowded place, then I'm officially qualified. Although I think I'm sort of precocious. :))

I can feel that the circle get smaller as we are older. But as it wears away, there goes another circles—the ones I completely feel strange about. We can't learn if we never try anything new, people said. So other than eating alone in a foodcourt, I also try to do something I never thought I'm capable of, and take all the opportunities I stumbled upon. 

I'm not kind of student who is gonna raise hands for each 30 minutes in the classroom for the sake of curiousity, so I was kinda surprised when I'm being the one whose students raise their hands to, and see what myself can do after then. I was all happy. Like really. 

I never wish to be a teacher, but right now I want myself to be one. I'd like to teach, share, and spread love to infinity and beyond. Here comes the lesson I learn in the process. 

Little Special Treat From GMYLE

This is the second time I received package from overseas. The first time was when I bought pencil case through eBay. I asked my friend, Dexsar, to buy me because I didn't have Paypal account yet at the time, while for the purchase through eBay must be done by using Paypal account. Purchases from foreign countries to Indonesia takes a relatively long time. I've waited for about two months until Dexsar told me that the package is already arrived. What a quite long time, as compared to the price of package that didn't even reach $10.

Last week, I received my second package. I've waited for over a month, and that noon Mom suddenly got into my room and gave me the package because she's the one who always get excited to receive such thing. 

So, a month ago, I joined a design contest in Instagram. The design contest was first announced by TheDailyType account. For Typography enthusiast, must be familiar with this account for sure.

A month ago coincided with the celebration of Christmas. I'm not celebrating Christmas tho, but I thought the prize that was offered is quite interesting (moreover, the contest was applied worldwide so the competitors come from all over the world and that's what makes it exclusive. LOL). We were told to make phonecase design with Christmas wishes/quotes, and three selected winner will get the phonecase with their own design on it. And also, the winners will be mentioned and featured on TheDailyType feed. I made my own quote that's pretty much related to the contest theme. So yeah.

Here are the three selected winners, and I'm so happy I was one. 

Instagram account:
colorsofchrist - secondhandinspiration - nichasy

As seen on the first picture above, there were two packages I took a picture of. Yep, I didn't think that I would have received two. I was thinking of doing a little giveaway, but right on the next day when I met my friends, a friend of mine asked me for the phonecase, so I think I'm just gonna give one to him. 

If you are interested, you can take a peek at GMYLE website and scroll over their collections to find one that suits best to your gadget. As what GMYLE stands for; Gadgets Make Your Life Easier.

Settle Down

When it comes to marriage, some people are persistent to make such thing comes true while some believe that it is not really necessary. Some people will get cranky when they're being asked about it. Especially when they already passed through the 'scheduled' time in where the society has insisted that they should have been married—along with the vibes that people bring which can make them feel less confident. 

To certain ages, marriage can no longer be used as a joke. The question we ask may sound simple, for example, "when will you get married?". One day, I asked that question to one of my senior. She answered the question with a wry smile on her face "I did, once". And then I suddenly reminded of the truth that she already got divorced and now she is raising a kid on her own. I felt really sorry by the moment she answered the question and gave hear a bear hug. Sigh..

A friend of mine has acknowledged that he thought the marriage is something he doesn't really need in his life. Of course, some internal factors become the reason why did he think so. There was just two of us talking, so the statement sound a lil' bit strong in my ear. He said that he has plenty of dreams in the future—and by the presence of someone in his life, he thought that it will just obstruct him in reaching out that dreams of his. What an idealist. 

I didn't blame him for the way his mind works, eventhough the statement he just barely spoken at that time somehow sounds mistaken. I also think that some people who are close to him will surely be disappointed. Moreover, when it comes to his family circle. By the way, he's going to be 31 by this year. So you can imagine the pressure he has been facing over years, especially everytime he's being told to find a life companion. I think that would be very way more disappointing to the woman who loves him—to get to know about his point of view about the need of marriage—which he thinks is not needed. Unless if that woman also has the same point of view that we still can survive without the presence of partner. But how would it be when two person with such point of view meet and fall for each other?  Probably, they will just spend days by saying "I love you" to each other and forget it a day after until one reveal it all over again. 

The divorce cases make some people don't believe in the sacredness of marriage. I often hear people said "even the married ones still has the possibility to get divorced" which pretty much sounds like "let's not be too surprised if any of us give up first because that's totally normal and that's how this life supposed to work"

The failures often make people do generalize. Some people don't believe in something before they experience, while some others experience without ever believe in it before. We tend to learn from the existing case, and that doesn't mean bad because being sceptical is also needed—eventhough we know that what each people are experiencing with different characters and level of intelligence will not be exactly the same. And there also goes a thing called fate, which is out of our business. You just can't generalize because obviously, it's not that every guys are jerk. It's not that every girls are slut. It's not that everyone who log on to Omegle is feeling horny.

A study concluded that what matters in one particular family is the presence of two biological parents. A children will do better when raised by a married mother and father. Thereby, the marriage is primarily needed. The conclution will turn otherwise if a children is raised by the un-married. Although there's no guarantee for the marriage to remain flawless. And yet, this life has nothing to compare with those well-written fairytale.

I believe in marriage with all the advantages and the shortcomings that follow. I believe in the hidden truth that two people who happen to love each other keep to themselves. I believe more in things people choose to be left un-shown. 

Nobody wants to be homeless. So once you've commited marriage, that's the time you place a home within that person whom you choose. That's all you carry whenever you're alone together.

Whenever you see old couple that has been together for like over 30 years, don't think that they are the happiest or the most loyal couple alive. Think of the effort they've been doing in order to taking care of their "home" instead of how happy they might seem, because that's the time you start to compare. 

Grow

When I was a kid, I used to be really afraid of overcast. I remember that each night, I always walk outside the house to check whether there are stars up there. When I couldn't find the stars lies over the sky, I feel worried. That means, the cloud is covering the sky. Which means again, the weather is not really good and it will be rainy by soon.

No, it's not that I dislike rain. But, my biggest fear at the time was bad weather that first come up with the sign of cloudy sky. I was really afraid of disaster. I was afraid that such thing would make me lose the ones I love. I can't even bear the thought about it.

It's kind of tickling everytime I remember those habit; walk outside the house and look up to the night sky. It's funny how the thick globs of dark cloud literally got myself worried. Despite the fact that as we all know, overcast doesn't always mean that it will be rainy tho.

All those childhood fears still well remained until now. During 21 years, there are a lot of overcast I've gotten through. Next, in the process of growing, the fears in my life becomes way more complex and varied; compared to the droplets which I used think—always—is a sign of disaster. I'm afraid of getting failed on the university entrance test. I'm afraid when I come home late after hours hangin' around with friends. I'm afraid of being not good enough in the society. I'm afraid of not having the opportunity to make my parents happy. There are a lot of things that I fear which not only makes my heart tremble, but it also makes me mentally overwhelmed. Well, the fears are now twofold.

The last couple years were the most challenging years. On the other side, there were also a lot of things I could pick as lessons. Sometimes I wonder how does it feels like to live with physical disability—for instance, blind. On the one side, they are classified as lucky because the shortcoming make them doesn't have to see the heartbreaking views, nor the heartless. Sometimes I think that life isn't fair, but then I think back again, "Do you think the shortcoming which they happen to live with is fair to them? NO."

I learn that this life is actually fair, because it's unfair for everyone. Everyone has their own role. Thereby, there's nothing such as useless nor unworthy. People are responsible for what they do.

I learn that in such a bad situation, we shouldn't let things get any worse. There are few things that better left untold—like the good deeds—or prayers—no matter how significant the influence that it brings.

I learn that everyone is struggling hard. They all got the ones they care for. If only I could, I wish everyone—no matter how bad they were once—whoever they are—could get into heaven. Like, really. We were born equally as human being.

I learn that if we see things as God's way, we tend to be way more grateful.

I could say that I'm shaped by the burdens that I had carried with me for so long. Those lessons got my insight turn another way around. They help me to grow and overcome things. I may not be the strongest or the most patient one. I'm just a life learner who try to let go of things. Because you know, things changes like every second. And if you can't adapt to it, you're defeated.