Runaway

Let's go to some places new
Where people are only few
We could pass by the empty streets
With the leaves strewn beneath our feets
There's no light but the stars that looks bright
Sharing jokes as much as we might
Making it another long but short night
And be filled with a little fight
Let's be anything silly
Forgetting that we were once lonely
Sit around with the sand or the land or the grass underneath
Listen close to the sound of each other's heartbeat
Let's be alone, with our hands holding.

We'll Never Find The Right One

Let go of the wrong person and find the right one, They said.

If only it is as simple as how it sounds. Because it's funny yet ironic how a person whom we define as the wrong one is the one whom we think is right at the very first place. Everyone have the same potential to hurt any human being, don't they? Then why are we thinking that we'll ever find one that will always do us good?

Get over it and move your ass on, They said.

It always takes time, I know. We can't force everything that's not meant to be. We could never forget the things that once happened, we could only pretend like we do—until we get used to the scars which the time has left us with.

You'll find the one who is willing to stay in your life, forever. They said.

Tell me, how long does 'forever' takes? Why are we blaming the one who only passed by—wishing them to stay a long while—when we know it's their right to wander, and in the end we got nothing to demand, at all?

Will we ever find the right one? I asked you.

We will always have excuses to doubt about anything. Every single thing. I believe somehow, no matter how far we look for something best, we could never find one which is really best. As well as the right people that I first discussed. The main case overall. No matter how far we look for it, we're never gonna find one. 

I know it's way too blurry. Let me tell you something which you might already knew.

You might love someone, right now. The one whom you call boyfriend/girlfriend. The one whom you believe that she/he is the one you'll spend the rest of your life with. There always the thought that arises as they make you mad, disappointed, or anything you dislike. She/he doesn't love me that much, you told so to yourself. And then you get miserable by it.

But again, people make mistake, and it's gonna change the way you think towards them. People will keep on making mistakes, as the time still ticking—as the sun still shining. No matter how long we seek, we'll never find 'the right one'. Because the right one is the one whom we define as the right one. We define them so. We know that nobody is perfect. And we know that even the one we love, make mistakes too. 

How Do We Get Inspired

 “..i want to be like you.” She said.

It was a windy afternoon, when we had our quality time at the terrace of our little house. I was busy chewing the fried bananas that she barely made for us, at that time. I smiled actually. Maybe that was only a hypotetical statement that a-10-years-old-girl could say. But I could feel the whole universe embrace me without using any arms. An invisible kind of embrace, maybe. Yeah you know that kind of feeling, though.

We both look so much alike. I don’t know, but I could see it way clearly. The existence of these ten-years-old girl with the personality that blooms within herself—I always feel like she’s gonna be like myself, someday.

Everytime I just got home, she would ask where have I been. Everytime I’m about to go, she asks me where would I go, either. I remember that night, when she asked me where have I been last night. I honestly answer that I’ve been to the wedding party of one of my friends’s brother. I mentioned my friend’s name too. I know she already knows all my friends’s name. The ones that actually never seen her yet. But she remembers each one pretty well. It doesn’t surprise me, until she mentioned my friend’s old nickname, correctly.

Cindy ‘Cleo’, toh?

I stood up there like, “wow, how do you remember?”

I know she has checked all the photos in my phone. But the photo of ‘Cindy Cleo’ is an old one that I never thought would cross her mind.

And then, I felt like I’m seeing a sign coming my way. She remembers things just as well as I do.

***

She also reminds me of my childhood. I used to be a kid with plenty of ambition that I always tried to keep up. That’s one of the things we have in common. Eventhough the ambition I used to work on never really get done. But still, there was an undefineable kind of pleasure to get to try something that we’d like to try—and as we grow up the memory of those childhood still always remain.

My old sister used to collect comics when she was in junior high school while I was still in elementary school. I like to read serial cantik comics at that time. The only title that I remember is ‘delicious’. As a little girl who get amazed with everything new, I was trying to draw comics on my own. As well as when I read teenlit novel, I was also trying to make a novel script. Sounds like I always want to try everything. That’s what I am.

I'm so much happy to see the picture above. That's the artworks made by me, and the picture below the first sketches is the ones which are made by my little sister.

She wants me to teach her a lot of things that I knew—probably by years from now on. Everytime I look at her, there’s something that drives my mind back to the past years when I was still a little kid. She draws. She writes. She even cooks ( when she knows she isn't that tall to reach the glass on the shelf). She might as well would able to play guitar (that’s one of the thing I’d like to teach her some times later)

As the time goes by, I realize that what I did in my childhood has given a big impact on myself right now. It’s always a good feeling knowing that you inspire people. As well as when we’re being inspired. People always inspire me (in a good way). And that’s what keeps me motivated.

We all have that 'role model', do we? The one we learn almost anything from. But I think we could always learn anything from anyone, out of the fact that role model is a person whom we admire. There always comes dissapointment whenever our role model do something which diverge from our expectations. Don't get depressed by that case. There the thing is, there the lesson we got to take; imitate the good things and get rid of the bad ones. Always. 

Sebab Kita Berdua Sama-Sama Tahu...

Kita berdua tahu tak ada yang abadi
Tak ada daun yang tak gugur
Tak ada hati yang tak hancur
Tak ada jiwa yang tak pergi

Kita berdua sama-sama tahu
Tak selamanya kita dipayungi bahagia
Tak selamanya kita diliputi cinta kasih
Bahwa kenyataannya roda ini akan berhenti membawa kita jauh sebelum kita tiba

Kita adalah sebatang pohon ditengah padang rumput gersang nan sunyi
Tegap berdiri sendiri
Dan seperti itulah kita adanya selama ini
Sendiri
Mencari arti atas pertanyaan-pertanyaan yang sukar dimengerti
Misalnya, untuk apa kita disini?

Kita bertemu dalam kekhawatiran yang sama
Mengetahui segalanya tak akan berlangsung lama
Semua terlalu sukar
Semua terasa samar

Apabila kita adalah pohon yang sedang merasa sunyi sendirian
Maka biarkanlah kehadiran masing-masing saling meneduhkan
Sebab kita berdua sama-sama tahu tak ada yang abadi
Lalu biarkanlah roda ini berputar dan kita mencintai sekali lagi..

-asy