April

Just realized that I didn't write anything on April, so I decided to make one. I mean, i'd write something about what was happening at that time. Though it's the end of May already, and June will be coming by really soon. But you know that April is the most wonderful month where I become the centre point of the universe in only once a year. Therefore I should write something out of it just like what I usually do, so then I'd be able to read them all over again—to recall the feeling that was once exist in the past years through these stack of notes that I wrote in blog.

***

We all deserve the happiness, just as well as the sorrow—or miseries—and the death that is owed. There will be the ones we'll have the pleasure to encounter, the ones in which the happiness are made by; the ones who cares.

It was the first time my tears fell down off my cheek as my friends appeared at next to my door. The last two surprises I was laughing at them for the silly yet lovely things they did to me at those kind of hour. It was midnight when there was a phone-call tellin' me that somebody is outside. They sing along with the whispering voices when my body showed up from behind the door. There was an undetected motion within which made me cry myself out, but i love my friends anyway.

Days before my birthday, i was kinda in bitterness. My dad is in illness and mom isn't in town. It's really hard to see him having not enough rest—that i'd rather have a break-up than to have that worst feeling anytime i saw his weary face. I spent time thinking and trying to quietly distract myself.

My parents are an endless supply of insipiration. A cistern of happiness that overflows.

It was still midnight. My friends were still around, and there was a taxi stopped by next to my house. It was my mom coming from the airport. She got into town not in the planned-time. She must have spent weeks in Pontianak, but then she came back to Makassar in less than a week. I went to her willing to help her carrying on luggages, also with the willingness that she'd give me a Happy Birthday. She looked panic when she asked why it is so crowded. I stood up there telling her that it's my birthday. My friends giving me surprise.

***

I slept in the dawn, as usual.

Thankyou everyone for making it to my birthday. 

Thankyou gengs for the midnight surprise, and the second surprise at campus. I also thank my sisters for giving me those silly yet unpredictable surprise which making me feel so loved. I only went for minutes and as I came back home, there they were. It was sweet that i've never thought that they could do so. :D 

Thankyou for the terang bulan keju, Pay. (i thank Ippang, too.) Thankyou my beautiful little sister (I actually asked even forced her before wahahaha) and Kak Yuyu for the white chocolates. 

Always remember that tomorrow is always a new day, and happiness is yours to have.

it's as starry as your eyes
the night sky when it's all clear
it's as starry as your eyes
the night sky as when you're near

it's been really long
i'm staring at those night sky
as if it your eyes that lies and sparkles
as if i'm able to pick one up to be brought home

i'm waiting for the morning to bring out the sunrise
i don't mind staring the whole night
as if you're staring back at the earth
as if you knew where i am
as if you knew i'm waiting

let's just stare at each other's shapes
let's not questioning things but listen to our serenity

i know you dislike grief
let's make something that makes no sense
but still worth remembering

i'll give my sleeve as if it's a pillow
where you could rest your head
it's not the story
of why didn't you make it to a great day
it's your presence
it's either your absences

your eyes are a bit starry more than those night sky
they're way clearer

please come nearer

(02.43 am)